Thursday, February 7, 2008

Diesel in the Desert

I've never made it a secret that I can't stand Shaq. For years it's been this way. The most I've ever liked watching him in action was in the 1994 classic hit "Blue Chips" where he played the charismatic and talented southern prospect Neon alongside Nick Nolte and Penny Hardaway. Penny's character's name was Butch McRae.


He was the most dominating player in basketball for about 10 years, and he does have multiple championships, but I still can't stand him. Every interview is something stupider and stupider. His self prescribed nicknames like The Big Pythagoras "because I'm like the Pythagorean theorem - nobody can solve me" - a squared plus b squared = c squared. His game was so boring, dominating yes, but boring - establishes his position on the block, dump the ball into him a couple dribbles backing down the out-sized defender a couple steps - kick the ball back out - back in a couple more feet to where he's right under the rim - dump it back into him - then Kazaaam - two handed dunk for another completely un-awe inspiring two points where he does half a pull up on the rim and raises his knees up a bit for the lucky patrons in the front row to get a nice whiff of the O'Neil family jewels. A big drop off from Michael Jordan's Playground. I'm so happy that basketball is finally evolving into a faster, athletic game and have been reveling during his rapid deterioration within the past year - until now.

Now he's a Sun. Back in Phoenix where he broke the hoop in '93 and got beat up by Barkley at some point some season. I (like everyone else) thought this trade would never happen. Terrible idea to abandon our core (Nash, Stoudamire, Marion) philosophy of run n' gun and take in the fat, slow, injured, dwindling Fu. A day later the headline said: Desert Daddy.

Stunned, angry, disoriented at first. But, now, the more I think about it the more I agree with the trade. I hate to say and can't deny that we weren't going to win a championship with the same team this year. We've had some good shots the past couple years, the breaks didn't go our way, we never made the finals and we were headed down the same road this year. We were going to run all over the regular season and then lose again in the playoffs. Marion's been a little punk all year and he'd be out the door next year with his attitude/chemistry problems and Suns' not wanting to give him an extension. So our "core" was going to split up at the end of this season anyways. Sarver gets a call that Shaq is on the trading block and this is at most the last potentially effective year he has in him. Nash can only play like he is for a couple more years at most - so, the time is now.

With this trade, they solve a few problems. Gets rid of Marion's punk-ass in the locker room; finally gives us a defensive presence in the lane and on the boards (see recent performances by Dwight Howard, Andrew Bynum, that guy on the T-Wolves and the past three years of Spurs games against the Suns for examples of how this was a problem); moves Stoudamire to power-forward - his preferred and natural position. Also, the Lakers' recent acquisition of Pau Gasol made them another scary, formidable opponent in the playoffs. The Suns had to act. Since Marion was bolting at the end of the season, it was a much better move to get something like this in return, instead of losing again in the Western Conference Finals and then having the same team we have now - only without The Big Aristotle and Trixy.

The key variable though, is injuries. Shaq sat out half the year. He's 35 and 325 pouds. It would be a complete bust if he sat out half of the games left in the regular season and the playoffs. In order for any good to come from this trade, Shaq's gotta be playing. It's a huge gamble - but it's one we had to take. Everyone's crying about how we're going to be slow now. I don't see how with Nash and Barbosa still on the team we would ever be slow. We may not be as fast as we were with Marion out in front - but we'll still be fast and fun to watch. Running with the Matrix only got us so far - maybe dropping it out of ludicrous speed and back into reality is what we need to win a championship.