Poor Perros

I live with two dogs. One is a basset hound named Leo who is a bastard. Adorable, but still a bastard. He urinates on most walls and corners of the kitchen and living room, goes b.m. on the patio next to where I dry my clothes, barks all day long and cries and moans if he isn't showered with affection.

There is a chair placed in front of the refrigerator, which is fastened shut by a velcro strap on its door, in efforts to deter the animal from his routine rummage through the leftovers and perishable provisions placed on the lower shelves. When these tactics don't work, Leo gets a stern, "Leo...what are we going to do with you?" talk from my roommate and a pop on the bottom, which the dog shrugs off and then runs into my roommate's bed where he licks his chops for extra tomato sauce or cilantro before taking a nice nap under the blankets.

The other dog doesn't have it quite as nice as Leo. He's a stray that has chosen my street as his best option for residence. I see him either lying on the sidewalk, scampering off down an alley or trying to follow me into my house about every day.

He's lost about a quarter of his hair, sleeps in trash piles at the end of my street and can barely open his eyes or wag his tail. Sometimes I see him in the morning nursing fresh wounds from battles the night before. Lately he's been wearing a blue dog sweater that some kind soul has donated to help him get through the dreary Santiago winter.

Unfortunately, the dog needs a lot more than a sweater and he is not alone.

The stray dogs in Santiago are some of the most eminent, depressing and reverberating blemishes on the capital city's streets. Downtrodden, malnourished, limping and sick, the pooches roam parks, sidewalks, plazas and marketplaces looking for food, shelter or a scratch on the head. The big ones who've been on the block for a while (because only the strong survive) dominate their domains, while the little guys scurry off in search of neutral territory, which usually means foodless territory.

They eat scraps out of trash cans, chase cars and bark at hubcaps (maybe they've lost a friend under the crunch of a taxi's tire and are trying to get even) and plunge their noses in tourists' pockets looking for lunch.

The pups that spent the previous night fighting for their lives lick their scrapes as the overfed bulldog saunters by with a new manicure on a walk with its owner through the park. They probably think, "You wouldn't last a week out here mamón." And you know what? They're probably right.

The clean-up crews work surprisingly fast and roadkill and remains of the defeated are rarely seen on the streets. Like they're sweeping 'em under a rug before the visitors walk by.

Most people are decent human beings and either verbally acknowledge the strays, glance at them, throw them a scrap or walk by felling sorry for them. Other less-caring individuals yell, chase, smack or brush them out of the way.

Granted, some of these dogs can be trouble and I can see why a business wouldn't want a bunch of stray dogs hanging around the storefront. But that's one thing. It's another thing entirely when they are kicked with steel-toe'd boots by drunken thugs, smacked with sticks or driven out to the countryside and dropped off to fend for themselves.

Coming from a family that has a history of volunteering at the humane society, postponing appointments to stop and pick up strays and worshiping its three canine members, this kind of treatment and environment is unnerving at best.

There are ways to help, but it's not as easy to make a dent in the problem like we do back home. A group of us recently helped out at a dog shelter in Melipilla, a town about an hour away from Santiago. Surprise surprise, most dog shelters in Santiago receive little/no government funding and survive solely on donations.

The conditions were startling. About 70 dogs living in an area a bit bigger than a basketball court. There wasn't much grass and the shelters were made from scraps of wood and chicken wire. We shoveled shit, cleaned the kennels, bathed, fed and played with the dogs for an entire Sunday afternoon. It felt nice to help out, but I left feeling like we could have done more. We're planning another visit in July and hope to build some new kennels for the dogs.

Don't get me wrong, the dogs in the shelter have it a lot better than those on the streets, but there is still much work to do.

One of the main problems, similar to the case with Leo, is the people. Many get bored or frustrated with their pets and discard them like an old toy. In addition, there is no push to get people to spay/neuter their pets, the cost of such procedures is pricey, leaving most dogs fully in tact, raring and ready to litter.

There are organizations working to combat these problems, but something so ingrained in such a polarized society is not easily remedied. It takes a lot to shorten the drop off from Leo's pillow on his balcony in the sun to my stray friend's spot on the sidewalk below.

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- Protectora de Animales San Francísco de Asís
Phone: Monica Cuevas: 765 919 60
monicuevaslara@hotmail.com

- Humane Society International: http://www.hsus.org/hsi/

- Agrupación Cultural Amor a Los Animales (ACUAA)
Esperanza 475 El Bosque
SANTIAGO, Región Metropolitana
Tel: + 56 (2) 5277 026
csprohnle@terra.cl

- Coalición por el Control Ético de la Fauna Urbana (CEFU): http://www.cefu.cl/joomla/

- Organización por la Protección y Respeto para los Animales (OPRA): www.oprachile.cl

- Somos Perritos: www.somosperritos.cl

- Teleton de los Animales Chile: http://teletonanimales.oamm.info/

Meet the Padres

June 4 is my mom's birthday and what better way to say feliz cumpleaños than to post the epic tale of my parents' week-long visit to Chile. In early April my mom (who henceforth will be referred to as "Mom") and Carlos (my stepdad, who henceforth will be referred to as "Carlos") took a break from the hustle and bustle of their busy, doggie-dominated daily lives to visit me on the other side of the world.

This was the first time I've had my parents visit me while abroad. While I've hosted visitors before (see archives) both in Chile and Japan, at various times of the year, each time has been a completely unique experience. This one was no different and definitely the most comfortable/classiest and tastiest visits of them all.

When my parents travel, the trip revolves around food and given that I've spent the past nine months starving myself, surviving mostly off of hot dogs, ham-and-cheese sandwiches and cheap beer, I was more than willing to comply with their restaurant-heavy itinerary.

They arrived at 7am on a Saturday. Lovely. Even lovelier was the fact that I'd been covering the KISS concert the night before and had been up all night finishing the article. So on no sleep, running on fumes and mate, I showed up frantic and an hour late to pick them up from the airport. When I arrived, they had just gotten through customs and I laughed at myself for forgetting that everything in Chile runs an hour behind schedule.

We had a flight scheduled to Puerto Montt that same night, so we spent the rest of the day taking in the sights of Santiago: Plaza de Armas, La Vega, Mercado Central, Lastarria. Laura (my lovely media naranja) assisted me in my tour guide duties, joined us for the rest of the trip and hit it off with the fam (yes, even with my mom; a feat that many a customer service representative have crashed and burned upon attempting).


We caught the plane that night after a much needed afternoon nap (in the filthy, piss-stained house I currently reside in) and got into Puerto Montt late and went right to bed. A big bed, with a TV in front of it and clean warm blankets on top of it. I'd forgotten how nice hotels are. It's great traveling with parents, especially when you're broke.


After multiple failed attempts at renting a car, and cursing myself for not remembering that everything is closed on Sundays in Chile, we took a cab to Puerto Varas in the late afternoon and set up camp at the luxurious Solace hotel for the next few days. Wonderful establishment. Highly recommended if you have the means and are in the area.

Puerto Varas and the lakes region was one of the most beautiful places I've seen in Chile. I realize I'm not the first person in the world to state that, but I'll reiterate it none the less. We rented a car (which we conveniently found available two doors down from our hotel) and drove around Lago Llanquihue. Stopping to eat, pick berries and apples and trespass onto beautiful somewhat vacant property.


The next day, it was time to fish. Carlos and I hit the river with our fly-fishing guide early in the morning, leaving the ladies on their own to drive around and most likely sample every type of chocolate available in the region.

We were pretty much the only boat on the river and fished the whole day. I, a novice fly-fisher, got some lessons (much more difficult than it looks, and it looks pretty difficult) and Carlos got to revisit his zen fly-fishing state. I forgot my camera, so while it would've been nice to have some pictures of the beautiful scenery, or one of those standard son/dad-holding-fish-on-a-boat shots, I'm almost glad I did. We were able to sit back and soak everything in. It was something that I'll always remember and the kind of beauty that can't be captured in photos.

That night, we ate at La Olla, a restaurant that came highly recommended and whose praise I will shout with all my mite. We ate at some excellent restaurants during this trip, but for me La Olla was the best. They specialize in sea urchin and serve mammoth-sized portions. I ordered a seafood sampler type plate that the server assured me was for one person. She must've meant one-hundred persons. I felt so bad leaving so much good food on the table.


We spent the rest of our time exploring the various lakes, waterfalls, mountains and rivers in the area and left Puerto Varas sad to be leaving, but ecstatic to have gone.

"Did they teach you to apologize at lawyer school? Cause you suck at it!"
--Brian Cox's character in Erin Brockovich
(the trademark Carlos twist)

We only had a couple of days left, so we spent the time seeing more sights in Santiago and then journeying to Valparaiso for their final day before they caught their flight home that night. We enjoyed Valpo, but it could've been better (I hate tour guides).


The general consensus was that it had been an excellent week. We ate well. Saw nature. Saw the city. Saw the ports. Went fishing. About as much as you can hope for in a one-week vacation. Mom and Carlos loved Chile and I was reminded of how lucky I am to be living in such a unique and beautiful a country; and more so, how lucky I am to have these people as parents.